I am on my second glass of Merlot and I have spent my day snuggled on my sofa binge watching the Handmaid’s Tale. Somehow, I have found myself in a very reflective mood. I am surprised to say this but I actually feel a sense of solace at an intensity that I have never felt before. For the first time in my life I can proudly say:
I am comfortable in my singleness!
The immense about of satisfaction that I feel is refreshing. Typically my mind is occupied with finding the love of my life, planning my wedding, pondering baby names, and fantasizing my future life. But in this moment I am enjoying relaxing with my bonnet on, eating dried fruit, and screaming at my television.
Honestly, I recall briefly thinking
Oh no what is wrong with me? I’ve turned bitter.
Frankly, there is nothing wrong with me and I am by no means bitter. But I have fallen in love with myself. Nowadays, I cannot wait to come home and spend time with ME. I look forward to cooking a meal while blasting 90’s R&B, setting goals, making vision boards, budgeting, and candle lit bubble baths with essential oils. I feel so accomplished, whole, and balanced. The idea of allowing someone to disrupt the peace and tranquility that I currently feel gives me anxiety. In fact, I am more protective of my energy now more than ever.
Over the past two months, I have shared the most intimate moments with myself. I have dressed up and taken myself on dates, enjoyed solo candle lit dinners, and dimmed the lights & wrote my deepest thoughts in my journal.
Sis, this is the type of self-love that feeds your soul. I encourage you to fall in love with YOU. Discover the most delicate and intimate aspects of yourself. Connect with your soul, balance your chakras, and focus on accomplishing your goals. After all, you attractive an image of yourself. So, love yourself unconditionally and the universe will return the love.
Alexa, play Soulmate by Lizzo.