For the longest time, I stayed in places where I was not wanted. In other words, I would hold on to people that were not holding on to me. Of course I would say to myself “I am so over them.” But I kept them in my energy. Holding on to hurt, resentment, and false realities keeps people in your energy.
Meanwhile, they were living their best life and I was sitting at home confused, imbalanced, and DRAINED! Absolutely exhausted because I was trying to pull a moving ship. My hands were bloody (figuratively of course), my crown was on the ground, and my soul was tired. I would internally scream “why can’t I let go? They have told me and shown me that I was not valued or wanted.” But I held on to the tiny grain of hope that I could pull that moving ship back to me. I kept reflecting and divining to further understand why I struggled so hard with letting go!
I came to the following conclusions Sis:
- I was vibrating extremely low and needed to raise my vibration.
- I started eating vibrant colored foods, dancing, and increased my cardio. I would also listen to binaural beats on YouTube while I slept.
- I lost a sense of my direction and felt like the world was against.
- This was far from the truth. In most cases I dodged a bullet and a train wreck of a relationship. So the universe was saving me and always had my highest good in mind! I created a new vision board to help me get back on track.
- I needed a physical change to boast my self-esteem.
- I started wearing my hair different, listening to Lizzo, wearing heals to work each day, and pulled out my favorite red lipstick. I woke up 15 mins earlier each morning to add a little more “damn she fine” to my makeup routine.
- I developed a hopeless narrative about love.
- I believed I would be single forever and often said it aloud. You must be mindful of your words. We are consistently manifesting our realities. So if you think it, so it will be.
- I wanted my ego stroked.
- I wanted someone to come crawling back to me just so I could reject them and boast my ego. I needed to put my ego in check. “Stop being so shallow Kay.”
- I compared myself to others
- All of the engagements and baby shower announcements made me cling to people in fear that their departure would pull me further away from my dream of becoming a wife and mother. But it was actually pushing me one step closer. I took a social media cleanse for one year to stop comparing myself.
Sis are you struggling to let go? Are you staying in places where you clearly aren’t wanted? Remember, once a person shows you that they are not capable of loving you in the way that you deserve, clear them from your energy, and wish them well. Check out my 5 things to do after a breakup post on Instagram!
Let that crusty and rusted ship sail. Your yacht is on the way Sis!