I have needed more emotional vacations than usual. My emotional vacations include unplugging from other people’s lives. At the end of the day, life is going to life. However, we can get so wrapped up in our friends and family’s lives that we abandon ours.
Like most healers I consulted the journal and asked myself the following questions:
- What area of my life feels the most exhausting right now?
- What/who is depleting my energy?
- Have I taken on the emotions of someone else?
My answers immediately made me gasp with guilt and I felt horrible for seeing some of my family and close friends listed. After facing the guilt and allowing the true message to peak, I realized that I spend a great deal of my time trying to heal my loved ones. I assume responsibility for journeys that are not my own. Now I know you are thinking, aren’t you a therapist sis? Isn’t it your job to help other people?
The short answer is “yes!” But it’s easy to maintain boundaries with clients. However, things get a little gray with the homies. In some ways, I have enabled those closest to me and I must hold myself accountable. I enable them to tap into my energy whenever and however they want to. For example, I will spend hours helping a friend dig themselves out of a hole and after the call I feel exhausted. Not to mention not one second was spent asking me how I was doing.
My intentional healing shapes me to be the strong friend that you reach out to when in need but sis we will tap into this more in a later blog. We must stop creating energy vampires and getting upset when they drain our energy. You will need fewer emotional vacations if you set boundaries and truly understand that you cannot heal for other people. Give that responsibility back to its rightful owner. Nicely package those emotions and respectfully send them back to the sender.
If you are feeling like you are in need of more emotional vacations than usual, I encourage you to reflect on the above questions. Let’s keep healing tribe.